Ha Ha Ha Ha
A dog walked into a bar and asked for a beer. With that, a
man at the bar said "I don't want to drink at the same bar
as this dog." The dog and the man got into a fight and the
man shot the dog in the foot. With that, the dog yelped out of
the bar and down the street.
A week later, the same dog walked into the same bar, this time
he was wearing a black hat, a black vest, black chaps, black boots,
a black gunbelt with a pair of black colt .45's, one on either
side, and a black bandage around his sore foot. He goes up to
the bar and says to the bar tender "I'm looking for the man
that shot my paw"
There was this young couple who, upon their marriage, decided
to spend their honeymoon in a quaint old hotel in San Francisco.
Upon their arrival they were promptly taken to the Honeymoon Suite
in honor of the special occasion.
Everything in the room was exquisite: Lovely antique furniture,
a huge bed with a canopy, in short-the works! The new bride was
going about the room looking at all the objets de art when she
came to the window which had a heavy brocaded curtain drawn shut.
Thinking to let some natural light into the room she pulled it
open to discover that their room was directly across a breezeway
from another room.
The other room's curtains were wide open and she was
treated to the spectacle of three men together on the bed, doing
what is commonly known as a "San Francisco sandwich",
they were stacked like pancakes and each was butt fucking the
guy below him.
She was shocked and called her new husband over to see the disgusting
sight. Her husband was equally incensed and called the manager
up to complain.
"What's the matter?", asked the manager worriedly, "Is
everything all right?"
The man replied, "I can't really adequately describe this.
You are going to have to come up here and see this for yourself!"
In a minute or two the anxious manager was there in the room inquiring
as to how he could be of assistance. The husband said, "Come
over here to the window and see what you think of this."
The manager went over to the window and stared for a minute at
the tableau before him. If anything, the three men in the next
room were even going at it harder than before.
After a moment of this the manager turned away shaking
his head, "That lucky Ralph. He ALWAYS gets to be in the
middle!
Lady buys a voice activated radio. She says "Classical!" Radio plays Beethoven. She's impressed. She says "rock'n'Roll" Radio plays Rolling Stones. She picks up the radio, accidenatally drops it on her foot and yells "Mother fucking piece of worthless SHIT!" Radio plays Rush Limbaugh!
A hippie gets onto a bus and proceeds to sit next to a nun
in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she
would have sex with him. The nun, surprised by the question, politely
declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts on
it's way the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want,
I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."
the hippie, of course, says that he'd love to know, so the bus
driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun
goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed
in robes and some glowing powder," said the bus driver "you
could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."
Well, the hippie decides to try this out, so that Tuesday he goes
to the cemetery and waits for the nun. And right on schedule the
nun shows up. When she's in the middle of praying the hippie walks
out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I
am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you
must have sex with me first." The nun agrees but asks for
anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to
this and quickly sets about to go to work on the nun. After the
Hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out,"Ha
ha, I'm the hippie!!" The nun replied by whipping off her
mask and shouting,"Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"
Q: Why does a dog lick his dick?
A: Because he can!
-BigDon
WORMHOLE